Happy Feast of Fabulous Wild Men Day (by Kat)

So, uh, today is apparently the Feast of Fabulous Wild Men Day.

Over 120,000 web pages result from a Google search of the phenomenon, and not one of those tells what the heck this is about or who started it. Okay, I didn't look at ALL 120,000+ pages, but I looked through a few. Finally, I went to the Wikipedia homepage and searched.

Wikipedia doesn't mention it...

Has that ever happened to anyone before?

Can something really exist if it isn't in Wikipedia?

Oh. Uh. I better not search for myself. Would it be creepier to see my name on that site, or would it be creepier to potentially not exist since I'm not listed there?

So, by the logic that I think I exist even if Wikipedia says I don't (just assuming, since I can't bear to actually look), I decree that Feast of Fabulous Wild Men Day also exists, even without the evidence of the aforementioned almighty online tome.

The cold weather, it's getting to me.

(Send help)

Feature or Bug? (by Kat)

In the world of IT, there's a question that pops up on occasion--is this a bug or a feature?

Is it supposed to do this? Did the designer think this was a good idea?

This question translates well into other areas of life, including soap-making. My soap has rings. My soap has tree rings. I'm labeling this, my first batch of soap, as the dendrochro-soap.

Bug or feature? I don't know.

I do know the rings are caused by non-insulated cooling on a not-so-warm kitchen counter. I don't know if it's bad, if it will fix itself on it's own like so many other problems are purported to, or if I'll need to re-mill the batch. The intensity of the scent decreased drastically, but I think it's still pleasant so I'm not too worried about that (bug or feature???).

All-in-all, I'm okay with this first attempt. I'm definitely going to do another batch in the near feature, but not until I get the kinks worked out of this batch.

Speaking of batches, I've got a batch of cakes in the oven as we speak (or at least as I type!). I'm using my brand new Chicago Metallic 8" cake pans to build myself a birthday cake. Smitten Kitchen has never ever never ever never ever failed me, so I'm trying yet another of her cakes, with absolutely no worries, to serve to the family tomorrow. The house smells so good....

Speaking of the house, it's so empty. We had family, including COUSINS!!! over for New Year's festivities. Giant snow forts, new games, lots of food, very late nights, and very sleepy mornings were the norm for the past few days. Now the house seems so empty. The Christmas decorations are down, the family is gone, the moon is waning, and Monday is nearly here. Bah.

But oh, the smell of that chocolate cake is something else....

Santa Baby (by Kat)

Oh, Santa...you're the man for me!
I love you, and I want to bear your children.
Okay, child, and okay, yeah, I did already. But still.
Santa baby!!!

Add to this three professional round cake pans,
Julia Child's two books on french cooking,
and one bag of blue popcorn kernels,
and you can see why I just absolutely lust over the jolly man.

Back in the Saddle Again (by Kat)

Salutations from the homefront!
(So happy to be back here at the homefront!)

We left home on Wednesday, and finally found our way back on Sunday. The roads were lovely, which may have been the best present we could ask for this year. It was strange to be away for Christmas--in some ways it was easier, in other ways it was much more difficult.

Right now, our second largest cat, weighing in at 25 pounds, is draped over my wrists as I type. Being away from home isn't as hard as that.

Hard was not having the traditional foods, the traditional sit-down dinner, the traditional drive around to look at the lights. Hard was wondering if the cats and chickens were okay, if our own Christmas tree at home had fallen over, if the house had burnt down. Very hard was the lack of espresso maker on the counter (or coffee of any kind).

Easy, interestingly, is a nearly identical list. No cooking an elaborate sit-down dinner for a crowd. Not having to look after our own animals. Driving up the road to get a coffee instead of making it myself.

Christmas is family, and we had that. We had Christmas. It was good.

In a few weeks, my aunt will be back in town again, after her absence of several months. She had Christmas with a neighbor in Arkansas. They had Christmas, too. They had it, and it was good.

But on the phone tonight, we started planning...we're doing Christmas again in January!

I can't wait!

Oh. And guess what we did Saturday night? More gingerbread houses!

Holiday Spirit (by Kat)

Ok. If someone finds my holiday spirit, will they please return it to me?
Unless you need it more than I do. I have friends and family to compensate--maybe you don't?
Maybe I left it under one of these piles around here.
There's a pile of paper I bought to print out our Christmas cards. I never took a picture I liked well enough to put on the card, so those didn't get made or sent.
Maybe it's under these piles of candy and cookies. I only finished up one basket. I took some in to the office, but there was already so much there that the secretary just bundled mine back up and put it away for me to bring back home.
Maybe my Christmas spirit is in the box with what's left of the presents yet-to-be wrapped.
I just wish I could find it.

In other news....we're jumping off a cliff into the realm of homeschooling!
We haven't landed yet, we're still in the falling phase.
Our town only has one middle school, and it's not a great place. Bet and I met there, and that's the only good thing to be said for it. Anyway, my daughter is getting 6 A grades and one F. The F teacher thinks she's learning disabled. She picks on my girl, she nags at my girl, and makes my girl feel awful. The situation has been spiraling downhill, the principal won't transfer any more students out of this class (six have left her class already), and so what is left for us to do?
Long-term fixes are required, none of which will help our girl. By the time the teacher has been retrained or fired, it won't help us out at all. So, we're grabbing the bull by the horns and we'll see what our hands end up full of.
I suppose that as her new teacher I'll need to refrain from ending my sentences in prepositions...

I need some joy, I need some assurance, I need to feel prepared.
Shower. Carols. Call the school and tell them to shove it. Call the Washington Virtual Academy to finish the enrollment process. Wrap presents. Get ready to leave this evening to stay at the in-laws through Christmas.

Ok, whoever has my Christmas spirit can keep it. I've got a list, I've got a plan, and I'm gonna make some of my own if it kills me!

Candy Canes or Candy Cannots? (by Kat)

Continuing the fun of Christmas injuries, tonight my
daughter and I made candy canes. Trouble is, they
look a little bit more like candy cannots, to me.

Add to that the burn/blister/owie owie it hurts
that covers the base of my index finger on one hand,
and the multitude of mini-blister/burns/ seriously it really hurts
owie owies on my other hand,
and I think I might be *just*about done with
Christmas basket making year.

Last year, these were a hoot to make, but this year--
well I only have 10 fingers and three are now out of commission.
The basket is a bit meager this year, with only fudge, caramels,
lemon-drop cookies, spicy molasses cookies, high-octane toffee,
and cinnamon candy cane cannots.
I'll sew up a few little ornaments to add to this
basket, and then I'm done.
Really, really, done.
Really.

Fudge (by Kat)

First of all, Happy Hannukah!
I just love all the lights!!
I even love the dreidel song...
Give me a minute here, folks...

All righty, then.
We've made toffee from a recipe on a website.
We've made caramels from an old family recipe.
What's next?
A confession!
The very best, and frankly, the only fudge recipe I ever make came from the back of a marshmallow fluff jar.
Maybe its because that's what I grew up on, but I've never tasted any better fudge. If you've never tried it, you should. You should do it now, as a matter of fact!

Family Fudge

Dump 3 cups of sugar, 3/4 cup butter, a dash of salt,
and a small can (the 5 oz size) of evaporated milk into a large heavy pot.


Stir almost constantly until a thermometer reads 234 degrees F
or a bit of candy dropped into a glass of ice water makes a thread,
or the very softest ball possible.

Remove the candy from the heat and add one jar of marshmallow fluff
(7 oz size) and 12 oz of semi-sweet chocolate.
I usually use chocolate chips, but you could splurge on
some fancier chocolate if you prefer.

Stir it up very well, then add 1 teaspoon of vanilla.
Stir very well again.
Nutty people can now add nuts.
(I'll look away while you do that, though, okay?)

Carefully pour the liquid fudge into a well-buttered 8 inch square (ish) pan.
Let cool, then cut into squares.
Keep well-covered.
Or just eat it all--that would be okay too!

Family Fudge

3 cups sugar
3/4 cup butter
dash of salt
5 oz evaporated milk
12 oz chocolate chips
7 oz marshmallow fluff
1 teaspoon vanilla
3/4 cup chopped walnuts (optional)

Butter an 8" square pan very well, and set aside.
Dump first four ingredients into a large heavy pot.
Heat to 234 degrees F while stirring constantly.
Remove from heat, add chocolate and fluff.
Add vanilla.
Add nuts (optional).
Cool for a few hours, then eat.

Easter Caramels (by Kat)

I can't remember ever celebrating Christmas without Easter Caramels until my parents moved away from all the family to come to Washington State. The caramels sat on my grandma's counter in a pretty little cut-glass candy dish. Each piece of caramel was carefully wrapped in waxed paper, just like the Christmas presents under the tree.

My mom is one of eight kids, so plenty of aunts and uncles parked themselves on the bar stools lining the counter. The trick to getting the most caramels was to be sure to slip between different stools each time. That way, no one ever noticed how many times you came back. The other trick was to throw the little wrappers away in the far back bathroom, where no one would ever see the sticky little pile of waxed-paper squares.

I was cute, too, as well as the only child, and looking back, that may have played a more significant role than I realized at the time!

The recipe for the caramels came from my great great aunt. She shared it with many, but specifically passed it down to my great aunt, who in turn shared it with many, but specifically passed it down to my aunt. Who Wouldn't Share with Anybody!!!

So, after we moved north, I didn't get caramels. My mom called and asked for the recipe, but my aunt wouldn't let her have it. My mom called the rest of her siblings, but nobody had the recipe. It's not that my great aunt wouldn't share, as some remember getting the recipe from her, it's that nobody still had a copy. Except my aunt...

A few years later, I called my aunt and told her to cough it up! Actually, it was probably more like, "Um, I miss you. Um, I love you. Um, remember those caramels? Um, can you tell me how to make them? Um, I love you?"

A week later the recipe came in the mail. She sent specific instructions that this recipe was hers and mine alone.

Hmph. Screw that!

I've shared this recipe with everyone, and I've shared that it's a family favorite. I've shared it and seen happiness spread and grow. I want you to make these, and share them, and share the recipe if people want it.

And who knows. Maybe it will make someone so happy, they'll share their recipes in return. The world could do with far fewer bitter old aunts, don't you think?

Oh, and just so you know, when my own niece asked for the recipe, I went to the local stationery store and bought the loveliest recipe cards I could find, and a beautiful pen with matching ink. I carefully wrote out the recipe, and let my niece know that this was a special recipe for aunts and nieces--and whoever the hell they wanted to share it with!

Easter Caramels

In a large, heavy, non-stick-if-you-got-it, at least 4 quart pot combine
2 cups sugar
3/4 cup light corn syrup
1/8 teaspoon salt


Now add 1 cup of heavy cream.

Bring to a full boil while stirring near-constantly.
If you're using non-stick, you don't have to be as vigilant as you do with not-non-stick.
Now, slowly drizzle in 1 more cup of cream.

Using your favorite thermometer, keep a close eye on the temperature.
You want to get to 240 degrees F.
Not under, not over, but right on the money.

It's a bit hard to tell, but the candy is a light tan color, and when the bubbles pop,
they do it in a sort of sticky manner.
I think Pooh-bear would understand that, and I'll just have to hope that you do, too!
Now add 1 teaspoon of vanilla, and chopped nuts if you'd like.
I don't like, so I don't add.

After stirring the vanilla in very well, pour the mixture
*CAREFULLY*
into a well-buttered 8 inch square(ish) dish.


Let cool overnight, cut into squares, and wrap each individual square.

Easter Caramels
2 cups sugar
3/4 cup light corn syrup
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup butter
2 cups heavy cream, divided
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2-3/4 cups chopped walnuts (optional)

Combine first four ingredients and one cup cream in a large saucepan.
Bring to a full boil, then slowly add second cup of cream.
Stir constantly until the temperature reads 240 degrees F on a thermometer or has reached the medium ball stage in a glass of ice water.
Remove from heat and add vanilla and nuts (if using).
Pour into a well-buttered 8 inch square pan.
Cool overnight, then cut into squares. Each square must be individually wrapped or you'll end up with a congealed cluster of caramel.
Remember that sharing is good and kind, and is the right thing to do!