Last week Suzanne, the farmer's wife, discussed how taken she was with a post on Laura's blog.
I could totally relate.
There are houses, and there are homes. Beyond that, there are peaceful refuges that have some sort of magic floating in the air. These are the home that, once you have entered, you will never totally leave behind. These are the dwellings that have such a positive energy, a sense of peace, that convey such a happy welcome to visitors, that it just gets lodged into the heart (get it? lodged?).
Bet might deny it, but she has one of these homes. Once you step foot into her house, you're home. When you leave, you take a bit of it with you.
Warm, cozy, happy, loving, peaceful, joyful, fun, welcoming...
I've only known a few people who were able to create such places. The only commonality I can find is that they were all women. Financially speaking, one was destitute, one was rich. One was young, most were middle-aged. Married and single. Monotheistic and atheistic. Graduate student, stay at home mom, working mom.
The peace in their homes wasn't bought with wealth, wasn't bought with age, wasn't a result of religion.
Last weekend my in-laws stopped by. They didn't' come in past the entry way. I offered them tea, coffee, homemade graham crackers. They didn't stay.
I tried to remember the last time someone wanted to come to my house. Other than out of town family visiting at the holidays, I can't think of anyone coming over to hang out in the past year. This isn't the house where my daughter and her friends go to hang out. I haven't created a haven.
I'm not saying this in a boo-hoo kind of way. Instead, I'm trying to figure out how to convey my love and acceptance of everyone into my home.
Tell me, have you been in one of these homes? What's the secret to having one of those really special homes? Can anyone create that feeling? Where do I start?
PS Next post is #100! It's a party, and the present is going out to you!
I've had to mull over this interesting post for a while.
ReplyDeleteIn the past, I've had the kind of home where for whatever reason, people feel comfortable "hanging out." Where I live now, it's still like that for my teenage daughter's friends, but your post made me face the fact that I don't think I've EVER invited anyone here to visit ME.
This is largely because I don't really have close friends in this town yet, but it's not just that. I think it's because I used to be WAY too social, and I've swung to the other extreme. But mostly in a good way, I think.
I'm much more focused on making my home welcoming to ME these days. It's MY haven, my sanctuary, my retreat. I just don't really want other people in it except those that live here. (And honestly, sometimes not even them :))
First, I am finally done with the final push! Yeah.
ReplyDeleteBelieve it or not I have been wondering why we do not hang out at your house more. I love sitting at your kitchen table and talking. I love walking through your house looking at all the things you have done with it. I love being in your gardens. Why don't we stay there more?
P.S. Mom is done with the book. I will have her take it to the store and put it at the counter with all the special order books by Saturday morning. Sorry. But she loved it!